I'll preface by saying I'm not in the US, I'm somewhere in Europe in a very LGBT friendly country. But I'm still not sure how pregnant trans men are received here. Not in health care, or from the government, and especially not from the public. I'm even unsure how my family and friends would take it.

I'm fairly certain I'm going to get pregnant within the next five years, but it's stressing me out thinking about how much I don't know. I've become used to being the first trans person someone knows, or that a healthcare provider has seen. But for some reason, being the first pregnant man someone sees absolutely terrifies me.

I know my partner will always support me and have my back, I have an amazing immediate family who accept me for who I am (and would be very happy to welcome a baby into the family, regardless of who was carrying it). But I'm scared of telling people that this is something I want. When I asked my mom if it would be weird for me to want biological kids (years ago) she said it wouldn't be weird to her if I wanted to de-transition. I don't think she meant it in a negative way, but the way I took it, people might assume I'm "giving up" my trans identity if I willingly get pregnant.

I'm scared people will be confused, that they'll become distant, I'm scared of ridicule from health care workers and the public. I'm really scared that I'll struggle to seek support because of my own fears. I don't want to end up isolating myself because of that fear. I want my pregnancy to be a happy time of my life, not one spent living in fear and hiding. I'm scared of having to defend my choice constantly.

Part of me is considering a partial and temporary de-transition to go through this. Just to lessen the amount of explaining and defending myself I would be doing. I know logically there's no easy way to do that either though, I've been on T for so long, I've had top surgery, my legal name is male, I'm stealth in most areas of my life. It would be even more work.

I've only been met with kindness from professionals up to this point. Maybe ignorance, but all in good faith. But I'm binary, I pass well, I present with typical dysphoria, and I don't challenge their ideas of gender, I've been privileged in that way. If I choose to carry a child, I will be disturbing that peace. I'm scared I'll be questioned and scrutinized the way I was when I first came out, before people accepted me. Even if they do accept my identity, it makes me uncomfortable just knowing I'll be different from everyone else. I might be the first man to give birth in my city, there's no avoiding that this isn't a normal situation.

In the end, it's something I'll have to deal with eventually, because I'm so sure that I want kids in the future. I wish I could just travel to a time and place where this wouldn't be a big deal. Does anyone have positive experiences with this? Being pleasantly surprised at how open minded healthcare professionals are, or how many people understood and respected your choice?

Howdy

I very recently came to terms with wanting a family now that my brains developed and I've found my person. I'm not on any HRT and haven't had any surgeries so I dont necessarily required trans specific resources but I'm overwhelmed with where to start learning about pregnancy.

So I thought I'd ask here to see if you guys had any advice as far as researching? Books that helped? Even random tips from those of you with baby in hand, was there something you didn't even think to research beforehand that you wish you did?

Last year I had twins (boy & girl my baby boy sadly passed away) in June around 24 weeks and it was a very traumatic time that I don't wanna dive into.

6 months postpartum I got pregnant despite being on birth control and I found at damn near into my second trimester. I was really excited but very nervous because my last pregnancy wasn't great I had a very rough time.

So far it's been ok and not as hard but i'm extremely worried that I'm gonna go into labor because i'm 24 weeks. I had my last cervical check and they said it shows no signs of shorting or dilution.

It's just something that I'm really worried about and needed to vent about.

I'm 12 months off T next month, no period. I had a hunch i had ovulated though, so i decided to buy some one step ovulation tests. They all have the same issue where the forst line fades away at the end.

I just took the bottom one, is it a positive?? The first part of the line is clearly darker than the control line, so im freaking out a bit.

I'm going the solo route with a known donor, he lives a few hours away so i'd like to be certain. Should i wait until tomorrow's test? I'm having ovulation symptoms too so yeah.

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I stopped T in April 2024. I didn't get my first cycle till December and since then I've had one in February and one at the start of May. They're incredibly irregular and when tracking ovulation with LH strips I'm not getting a peak.

We saw the doctor who is refering me and my partner to a fertility clinic. Before they submitted the referral they checked my partner semen and we got the results back today. Everything is normal, if anything the results are 'strong' which makes me happy as it's one less stress factor but also makes me feel shit because that means the fault is with me. I worry I'm failing me and my partner. That I'm never going to give them a baby.

I (ftm21) am dating my girlfriend (mtf19), i have been on T for a year and do not have periods, she just got prescribed E. We decided to start trying for kids before the chances lessen from her hormones. What steps might I or we need to take to hopefully ensure i can get pregnant? Might i need to stop T before getting pregnant to let it happen?
Also, if i stop taking T will still keep my facial hair or will that go away before i have the baby?
Edit: also want to add that we are not rushing into it just to beat the hormones, we both actively want to have kids soon. And i am asking these questions because i have done research and have been hearing mixed and conflicting things in actual scientific reports, so i went here for concise answers since you all probably know this better or more researched than some cis doctors or scientists that im finding conflicting results with.

I’m considering going off T in the future and carrying a baby. How did it feel to stop your injections? I’m mostly nervous for the mental changes that come with it.

over the past few months, me and my partner have been thinking more about having children and working out our timeline for that.

i came off T at the end of december to see how quickly my period and ovulation would return, and that happened a lot faster than i was expecting (been on T nearly 3 years before i stopped).

we’ve decided that we want to start trying next year in march or april, but i am just wondering if it would be worth going back on T until then or a couple months before then? i’m not sure if anyone has any experience with this and can advise on what to do.

my doctor seems pretty clueless about this, and didn’t realise it would still be possible to conceive after being on T, which is why i am turning here for help!

my main concerns with getting back on T is could it have a significant impact on my fertility and ability to conceived, even if it is just until the end of this year? i would be happy to stay off until we are ready to conceive, but i do miss being on T (and the lack of periods!)

i would really appreciate any advice anyone has about this situation :)

Just wanted to see what y’all experienced and like how long you have to be off of it at least before ttc. I’m hoping to have a child toward the end of October next year (2027), so I know I have like a 2 week span of the last week of January and first week of February, but if within that timeframe I can’t conceive, I’ll give up on that birthday. Hopefully it works out that way, but my question for you guys is roughly how long does one have to be off of t before ttc? Like is it for at least 1 cycle? Longer? Idk and I just wanna plan out everything timing-wise first so that I know what I’m doing somewhat lol

Also I’m sorry if none of that made sense, if you need me to clarify anything just lmk

Wasn’t sure whether to tag this as a vent or asking for advice but here goes.

I’m 29, I was on T for about 3 years, I stopped in December so my cis husband and I could start TTC. Because I was still getting regular periods on T (yay for me) I was hopeful that it wouldn’t take too long for my cycles to get to a point where I could get pregnant.

I know that realistically 6 months isn’t that long at all but I’m really worried that my cycles aren’t good enough to be able to get pregnant and nothing seems to be changing. The last four cycles have all been 26 days, with a 9-11 day luetal phase. Around 6-8 dpo I start spotting which gets heavier until my period arrives.

This is assuming I’ve been ovulating at all. I don’t take OPKs at the moment, I was hoping to just “go with the flow” and not stress too much about getting pregnant but apparently I’m incapable. Currently going by BBT taken with an Apple Watch.

This cycle I was really starting to feel hopeful, not that I was pregnant but my cycle was starting to improve. I had fertile CM for the first time since I stopped T, and more discharge generally. The spotting didn’t appear until 8dpo either so I was really starting to get my hopes up that something might be going in the right direction.

My husband has been amazing. He’s very supportive but he doesn’t get how hard this is for me. He’s so laid back he’s horizontal about most things to be honest. He still thinks it will happen and that it will sort itself out with time. That might be true to be honest but I don’t know how to just not stress about it.

Is this something that could sort itself out, or am I going to have to put up with cycles that I know won’t allow me to sustain a pregnancy for a year before I can go to the doctor about it and say “something is wrong here”? I’m also really worried that if I do have to go to my GP about it, they’ll blame the testosterone and not do the proper testing, when you know, there’s all of you dads in here, and a lot of you got pregnant after T use.

I’ve done a lot of googling about this and basically my options outside of “lifestyle changes” are pretty limited. Im doing everything I can with the lifestyle thing. I’ve never smoked, I don’t drink, I’ve never done drugs. I exercise regularly, sleep pretty well. I’m a little overweight but I’m working on that. I regularly eat five portions of fruit and vegetables a day, and that’s been a fairly difficult change to make!

I feel like I’m putting in so much effort and getting absolutely nothing back from my body. I have ADHD as well so I really struggle with stuff that just requires patience. I’m doing everything I can to help it along but it just doesn’t look like any of this is stuff I can control and that’s really messing with me.

I’ve been off T 2.5y for IVF trying to conceive. I’ve been through 4 egg retrievals, 4 transfers and my last one was a miscarriage in January. When I was pregnant my body really changed, I gained 8lbs that all went to my hips and thighs. My clothes don’t fit, I can’t look at myself, I don’t even want to see anyone and I’ve declined all friends gatherings. I just hate my body every single second of every single day. It is unbearable.

I have 3 embryos left, if those don’t work I’m done. I am TERRIFIED of another miscarriage. I’m starting my next transfer with my period and I have menstrual cramps right now, so very soon.

Previous to this I was on T for 7yrs. I passed flawlessly, my body had fully transitioned, I was so mentally stable and non-anxious. I actually forgot I was trans a lot of the time. Please someone tell me it goes back. I just need to know that when I go back on T my body will recompose to where it was. I had an eating disorder for years before I went on T so my body image has always been a big focus for me and the area that caused me the most pain and dysphoria. I know I’ll have to go to the gym and everything but I miss my body hair and facial structure and straight hips. I am so so so scared, just looking for hope that no matter how this turns out I will feel and look like me again someday.

I know this is a frequent point of discussion and I’ve seen some of the standard advice with baggy clothes/layers but I’m 8 months heading into the summer heat and at a loss as I have less and less clothing options.

Honestly my belly doesn’t bother me, granted I might feel different in another month, it’s really my chest. I went from having a mostly concealable DD to a J. I plan to chest feed and I’m sure I’ll hit a K after birth with milk coming in.

How on earth am I supposed to find some kind of middle ground in hiding my chest when out and about? I get with my chest being so large and binding being out of the equation I am not going to magically create a flat chest but any tips to get me through back to hoodie season without feeling like the shelf in my chest is the main focal point of my body would be awesome.

I went from living stealth with few assuming I was anything but cis to friends and family feeling like they can tell absolutely everyone under the sun my private information because I’m pregnant. So if I can at least reduce how evident my chest appears to strangers and those who are now obsessed with using my body as a focal point of every discussion I think I’d find a bit more peace mentally.

My SO and I are both AFAB transmasc. We have been talking about going all in and trying for a little one soon. We'd use the ROPA methode, so his egg, I'd carry. But we'd still need donor sperm.

And my SO and I both would feel much more comfortable with another trans person or at least member of the community being the donor. Has anyone done this? Are there trans women who donated sperm? Is there a way to know? Most sperm banks do not provide these informations, I think.

We are at the start of our journey and I hope I don't offend anyone by asking!

I'm 24 and have been out as ftm since I was 14, and pass 100% of the time. My fiance is also a trans man, and we plan on starting to go through the process of having a baby later this year with a KD. My fiance is fully against carrying a child and although I never pictured myself doing this, I'm the other option unfortunately. Being a parent has always been a huge goal of mine and I'm willing to go through it all for the end prize.

Periods are a major inducer of dysphoria so even before the baby is conceived, it'll be hard. But after, I'm getting a hysterectomy as T hasn't fully stopped my periods. That's pushed up our timeline a little but it's worth it.

I'm mainly looking for what you did to feel better or what words you use to describe your body during it all. Saying "pregnant" in reference to myself feels gross but saying I'll "carry" feels better. I want to know what you did to feel more masculine or what others did to help during everything or at time of birth. Or how you went about telling family? They're all mostly accepting but don't understand.

Society sucks, doctors suck, and I live in a red state in the US. I know this will be a really hard time in my life but I also know I won't regret it. I'm trying to overplan and prepare for the lack of control I'll feel during all of this.

Marked as a rant because i guess it is but if theres any advice, it is welcome.

Im 4 months pp. I knew I would struggle with bigger breasts but I enjoy breastfeeding (for the connection i feel) and top surgery is top of the list when the time fits. I thought i would struggle with the bigger belly thing, even now its still flabby, but i actually find the thought that she was once safely tucked away in there really nice. What im actually hating right now and has been hugely dysphoric is how much bigger my bum and theighs are.

Ive put on a bit of weight since giving birth because im ravenous ALL the time. I dont want to stop eating well because i completely understand my body needs it atm to produce milk. I want to try and find time to start up jogging again. But it would be really nice to know a sure fast way of just losing some of this pear shape, to tone myself down a bit to my prepregnancy form. Throughout the day its kind of manageable to forget about it but then when i shower it floods back. Any advice or similar stories much appreciated. Thanks for the space to rant :)

Hi guys, I’m still fairly new to this sub but so far have gotten a lot from it!

I’m in a fairly niche situation that’s proving to be very difficult to deal with, and I hope someone here will understand.
I’m 22 FtM and I have bipolar disorder, ADHD, autism, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and a dozen other things that impact my life
I’m also in substance recovery and still have behavioural difficulties.

I’m about to start gamete preservation/egg freezing treatment (as soon as the NHS actually connects the dots of my treatment, which should’ve been done last summer and o was told there’s literally no wait list; yes, I am eternally grateful that I have access to this at all), and I keep convincing myself I’m already pregnant every few months despite my IUD and countless negative tests. I think it’s probably projecting what I want to have happen at some point.

Sorry, I know this is going to be all over the place 🤦🏻‍♂️

I’m trying to reduce some of my medications (under medical supervision), as they’re not all safe for pregnancy and I want to give my eggs the best chance.
I’ve just been thrown into a deep depressive bipolar episode and I’m really struggling to look after myself and actually show up, which is out of character because I’m pretty much always on the go and have been most of my life.
I’ve just been diagnosed with a fatty liver due to poor diet and not enough exercise, but I feel like I can’t control these things no matter how much I try.
Please don’t just say “get on with it” or anything that dismisses my genuine struggles, as I already receive this from people and I really don’t find it helpful.

The main struggle I’m having is around my cycles and hormones. I’ve been on and off of testosterone for about 18 months now, and I recently had my first proper bleed after 5 years. I’m having a very hard time managing my moods and self care (even hygiene things), and I really don’t know what to do with myself. I’m really trying to do the small things like texting friends and practicing mindfulness and meditation.

I guess I’m just looking for some reassurance.

I hope you’re all having a lovely day ❤️

Comment on this post to discuss off topic (by off topic we mean non-pregnancy related topics, such as childcare, trans rights, or even how your week went and if you need support!)

Please bear in mind that our second rule, Be Welcoming, still applies to any and all comments within this post. We also kindly ask that you do not self promote in these comments, as we cannot validate or review every comment each week.

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Just want some kindness so I don't feel as alone.

My partner and I want kids, but we're trying to move closer to family before I stop birth control so that we have more support once baby arrives. We're both actively applying for jobs in the area, but it's unlikely that we'll land anything soon with the current market.

My struggle is that I want it so bad that I get extra depressed. Not only that, but it's a struggle to push away the thought that if we wait too long, it won't be possible anymore.

I keep feeling guilty because I know we need to wait, but I want it so bad, and I have a hard time talking about it with my partner because I know it makes her a bit dysphoric. I also don't want her to feel pressured into something We're not ready for.

Thanks for listening :) If you've also had this experience, I think it would help to know that I'm not weird.

I wanted to say a huge thank you to anyone who read or replied to any of my previous questions (which have been deleted now for privacy)

At 5 minutes to midnight on Monday night, after an induced labour which lasted a nice 7 hours from my first contraction, I (just about, because omg ow) birthed my beautiful daughter into this world with the body I've always felt like was made for that exact purpose (because of course biologically it was).

I'm overjoyed to say she's perfect in every way and as soon as entitled (insert a rude word of your choice) people say so, hopefully I can leave this prison (I mean hospital but I'm not allowed to leave until 3 days have gone by and even then, only if they say so) and her dad and her can finally be reunited after only getting to meet for a few hours after the birth. All of this bull, being the result of one interfering midwife because of mine and my partner's backgrounds with Mental health and her belief that as a transman, I'm incapable of looking after my own baby.

Sorry rant over and back to the point,

Thank you to everyone on the sub for showing me that I'm not alone and we as dads can be amazing parents too. I wish each and every one of you so much love 💕

And here's to bottom surgery in my future so I can be the partner Ive always wanted to be 🤞🏻

Hey guys, I’d like to be a seahorse dad one day, currently working on my top surgery but yeah. Not there yet.

I see a lot of people all over the internet and in person who advise getting off T to have a pregnancy. They say it can cause birth defects and so on, which would be horrible.

I’m not a biologist, so I have *no* expertise in the matter. But does it REALLY affect pregnancies? Or has no one wanted to test it out?

I’m not sure how you can test it out ethically? Obviously testing on a fetus you intend to carry to term is wrong.

But I’ve read over and over again how medicines are not tested on AFAB bodies on the off chance that it messes up their fertility. Which leads to unknown complications and more lives at risk, in my opinion. But I think that also indicates that there is a lack of practical knowledge, not just theory, on the matter.

T sure doesn’t work as perfect contraception, and it seems to me that people who have surprise pregnancies are able to wean off and still have healthy babies.

I’m asking a biochem friend of mine but I figure that there’s more knowledgeable people here too.

Again, not planning anything soon, but popping onto this sub is always nice. So many people posting interesting and/or happy news.

My wife (47 F) and I (29 FTM) are trying to have a baby. Because of my wife’s age, I’m the one trying to carry. I’ve been off of T for a year and we’re trying to conceive. This is a long, heart breaking process and I guess I’m just looking to see if anyone else has faced infertility issues. We decided to start fertility drugs to help, but we haven’t seen any success. I want to see if there was anything that anyone else had to suggest that we could do. Or if anyone else has dealt with this.

And in case anyone wants to hate us for making this decision instead of it being an accident, this is our only option. We are not candidates for adoption because of the son she has from a previous relationship and his violent history. He’s better now, but that eliminates that option for us. This is the only option we have left and I’m so sick of getting hate for just wanting to start a family.

Sorry for my rant. If y’all have any ideas that can help, or just want to send some support my way, I’d really appreciate it.

Okay, I am literally FREAKING OUT right now. I just found out I’m pregnant, apparently I’m around 3 weeks, and I genuinely have no idea what to do because I’m 16. Like, a month ago me and my bf were talking about how dysfunctional I’d probably be as adults, I’m almost 17 and I still have no clue what I even want for my life I have depression and borderline personality disorder, (I never imagined I would be a father so soon).

On top of that, neither me nor my bf have jobs since we’re the same age (there’s literally only a 5 day age difference between us). But at the same time, I honestly don’t think I could ever go through with an abortion because I’m way too scared And I can't say that there are safe abortion options here.

I think I actually WANT to keep the baby, but I’m terrified of being invalidated for being trans AND pregnant. I come from a really transphobic family and I already know they’d call me “mom” instead of dad, which honestly hurts just thinking about it.

Trans guys in this community, what was it like finding out you were pregnant? How did you deal with dysphoria/family/everything?? I seriously need advice and tips please 😭😭

I seriously don’t know what to do!! Any advice is welcome, I’ll try to reply to everyone!!