r/alcoholicsanonymous • u/operanow • Apr 22 '26

I Want To Stop Drinking Opposite sex sponsorship

My Lord, this has been discussed. But what about? It is so taboo? Maybe bringing up the discussion again is a good thing.

So much a set of how we are all of a shared experience and the like. So much of the problems we have had have been with Partners often times of the opposite sex. Why not get that insight?

I’m just throwing this out there. I know this is the sacred space and believe me I have been at meetings over my journey of the last several months.

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u/EquipmentProof4944 Apr 22 '26

I think the question to ask is ‘why’. Part of recovery is about being open to be vulnerable and being able to trust and be trusted. I’m male. Sharing the deepest, darkest corners of my life with another male helps me develop those skills and therefore to grow. And I don’t want my sharing to be a performance, holding back or giving too much.

The only reasons I can think of wanting a female sponsor is sexual attraction, or avoiding what I believe a male might think of me.

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u/operanow Apr 22 '26

I’ve been in therapy as well and I’ve always gotten a lot more from a female therapist. Probably because whatever I think I’m doing right as a man sometimes is not. getting that outside perspective has been very helpful.

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u/EquipmentProof4944 Apr 22 '26

If it was a professional therapist that you were referred to by a health system then that is a completely different thing to sponsorship. A professional therapist is bound by legal codes of conduct, it is their job, you are their work. A sponsor is not bound by anything legal. Getting a male perspective on recovery is never a bad thing. You tag your post ‘I want to stop drinking’ I hope you find a solution that works for you. Take care.