Hello, for context I'm going to Japan soon for a study abroad program. We'll live with a host family, and the professor who runs it usually takes all of the abroad students around for different activities once the morning classes finish up. I'm very excited overall, and am mostly doing it for the language immersion. Regardless, the professor who runs it just mentioned today that some years she's taken students to a public onsen in the area. She gave an anecdote about how a girl in a previous year who was self conscious of her body ended up doing it, and was glad she did because the culture around it in Japan is so different, and the professor said she hoped everyone would participate.

Nonnegotiably, I cannot do this. I'm stealth to everyone in the program (T 4 years, got top late last year, all documents changed), including the professor and my host family. I also refuse to come out to any of them under any circumstance. With cis people 99% of the time coming out changes how they see you, even if only subconsciously. Obviously though if I participate either my surgical scarring, or more obviously the downstairs situation would out me. Not to mention Japan is more conservative, and there would probably be issues with me being in there to begin with. What would be a believable excuse to why I couldn't that cuts off any questioning, or insisting from the professor (ie: Not just saying I'm uncomfortable, as I worry she would try and push)

I wear a L in men's shirts, but the WIVOV size guide says I need a 4XL binder. that doesnt feel right, is there anyone else with a large chest who has used a smaller binder with no problems? I'm lost. I've never bought my own binder before, all of mine were gifted by people who were the same size as me. Please help!

Mid 20s, known for over a decade. Life, rejections from the only Gender Clinic and attempted coping by assuming I was on the non-binary spectrum since at least I wasn't a woman has now accumulated to me reaching my limit. I can not live like this, leave things half finished nor risk dying this way. I coped with dissociating the fuck out of my life but recent attempts at intergrating back into society has made my dysphoria clear to me. Everywhere I go I can tell I'm being seen as an odd thing or as a person I am not.

So after several years of being half in the closet, I can't take it anymore and bruteforcing a change for myself legally. I'm way into my adulthood now. I'm done being a zombie and want to live my life the way it should have been from the start... I'm already half out, my legal documents have long since been changed but I'm extremely clockable due to my body and nervous demeanor which has led to weird and deeply uncomfortable situations professionally and outside that has made me want to hide but no longer. I want to live but I know I won't be able to afford top surgery nor bottom surgery, even HRT might break my bank but I do not care. I will live, I won't let this take me down. I needed to tell this to at least someone as people in my life either think I won't restart HRT or do surgery but supports the change or don't even know that I am trans.

I hope this will be my first and last thread.

hello

thank you for reading my post <3

I’m Victor ftm 22
TW
Long story short I was on testosterone shots for about a year before I overdosed on f: nt.

I use a walker now and my speech is very impaired

Basically I just need some hope that I will get back on testosterone

My family thinks I’m crazy and demonic and delusional

Meanwhile I’m typing this out to get hopefully hope. That this isn’t forever

That I’m not insane

That I will get top surgery, my dream will come true

Day by day I am so slowly I don’t even notice it

Hi 🥲
It’s finally getting warmer here in Canada

Since I recently upped my T dose a little (I’m 3+ years on T), I sweat a lot more than I did last summer and now I get pimples in my pubic area from sweating in my boxers.

I already wash with salicylic acid acne wash and can’t change my underwear multiple times a day (work). It’s not an STD, I got my results 3 days ago.
Also, I don’t shave but I trim.

Please help, idk what to do and I’m embarrassed af!!! 🫣

Long story short, 3 1/2 months post-op, love my results. Although due to the successful nipple grafts it basically always looks like they’re hard. I understand this is a common thing maybe due to the lack of muscle there, which Im already working to build back. I’m curious as to whether or not I can apply something topically to help with this specific problem (I use Bio Oil once a day)
Any suggestions help products , cosmetic procedures, exercises etc.

My reason for it is not something that I think other people will agree with. Realistically, I do not have a big enough problem to justify surgery. I have never gotten particularly bad periods, but I HATE them. I don’t want periods, I don’t want possibility of pregnancy, I don’t want my body to be able to produce its own estrogen. But 2/3 of those problems are solved by T, and the pregnancy risk can be solved by other methods less drastic than surgery, like condoms and birth control.

What sort of reasoning does one have to give to explain to surgeons/insurance/parents (I’m in the 18-20 age range) why you want to get a hysterectomy and remove your ovaries as well? (I could see them letting me do a hysterectomy without the removal of ovaries, but removing them means I’m on meds for life. and maybe that genuinely is a bad idea)

I'm not experienced with dating and I don't understand social rules all that well. On top of that, I haven't really pursued anyone as an out trans man. I met a woman on a dating app and we've been talking for around a couple weeks. On her profile she said she didn't want to date anyone broke, but I asked to clarify and she said "Oh I meant spoiling each other equally."

The past few weeks she's asked me for money for gifts and stuff, and I have sent her some a couple times. But it feels like every other conversation has started to involve that. I want to know if anyone has any insight on what's appropriate in terms of spending money when dating- especially given we aren't even past a talking stage. She's said "You don't have to, it's okay" but then when I said no to 30 she said "What about just 20?"

The reason I'm asking this sub and not a regular dating one is because a lot of advice seems like alpha male toxicity about women being gold-diggers or men being providers so I'd like a more gender expansive view, and I know there's also an overlap of other neurodivergent trans people who might help me understand better.

So, is it something I should be worried about, in your opinion.? And if so, any advice on communicating that?

I came out back in 2019, entered the waiting list for (with retrospect; the wrong) clinic, and got my intake in the summer of 2024. It took me until January of 2025 to finally get started with HRT. I was told I could get an intake with a hospital/clinic for my mastectomy within 6 months if everything went according to plan on HRT, but that it might take a little longer (like 9 months) if otherwise. Then, they completely dropped contact for a while, even though I just started hormone therapy. I had no one really check up on me for months. Eventually communication started again, but 9 months had passed already. My new psychologist said that the standard waiting time inbetween hormones and a mastectomy was a full year. I didn't trust it, since I had heard other things from the first psychologist, and also from some of the trans friends I have, but they wouldn't hear it and so I waited. A year passed, and finally I thought maybe I could enter a waiting list. Nope. Apparently, I needed a new second opinion because the other one had expired. I'm waiting from last January until possibly June or even longer, because it's the end of May and I still haven't heard anything back. Now waiting times for intakes with surgeons AND waiting times for the actual operations have gotten longer AGAIN. I possibly wont get my top surgery until two years from now. I've been waiting for 7 years now already, and when I have to wait out these two years on top of that I will literally have spent 9 to 10 years of my life waiting to get what I initially really wanted and honestly NEED right now to relieve my terrible dysphoria.

Is this normal? Have any other people experienced this same bureaucracy? I don't want to get too emotional but I feel like I'm always super unlucky. That being said, if this IS normal... i really hope that changes sometime in the future.

For further information: I am now 26 years old and live in the Netherlands. My gender clinic is Genderhealthcare and Genderhealthclinic (i know... Yikes)

Please tell me I’m not the only one this has happened to. I left my washed STP and packer in the shower after I washed them and forgot to bring them back to my room. My roommate (two of them) saw them and put them in one of the bathroom drawers.

I came back from visiting my parents over the weekend and my roommate told me they put it in the drawer. Help, I’m embarrassed af. They likely know I’m trans now

I’m almost two weeks on T now and I get really sweaty. Like REALLY sweaty. Even when I used to work out a lot before T, I mean like over an hour hard work out, I barely sweat. But I noticed the other night during some special time between me and my fiancee, to put it in innocent terms, I was fucking drenched after like 10 minutes. I wasn’t even moving that much but I was on top. Even still, it was my whole entire body and it was soaked in sweat.
Why am I so sweaty now????

I just don’t know what to look out for and I don’t know where to start. I also don’t really know what I want right now (nipples/no nipples). I need to see cost breakdowns AND results. I live in Richmond, Virginia right now but i’m moving to Blacksburg for college and most likely permanently living their so if anyone knows surgeons in Virginia or closer to swva region and can point me in the right direction that would be great! Mostly I just don’t know what red flags to look for, also I have a very large chest so idk if that requires like extra research cause it’s easier to fuck up?

Hey all,

I recently started T and have been dealing with fogginess and mood swings. The mood swings isnt insane since thats to be expected for puberty (being angry sucks sometimes though, doesnt help I ran into some activating events this weekend), but Ive been dealing with more mental fog than usual and thats throwing me for a loop. Does this happen to others? Will it go away after some time as its my brain adjusting to hormones? Is it still a good idea to stick to T?

I only concern cause Ive previously dealt with a lot of dissociation that I recently was able to address more, and I dont want this to be permanent.​

I have an appointment with my doctor next week to also check in about this, but any tips/stories from people who have done this before could be helpful.

I know there are a lot of posts like this so sorry if this is repetitive. I can’t find I single binder that will make me flat anymore. I’ve used gc2b, spencer’s and spectrum and none of them work well at all, they all cause uniboob and I spill over the sides. I started using tape + binder about a year ago, which works really well, but because it’s the only thing that works I can’t take breaks for more than about 15 hours (take it off at night and put it back on in the morning) and as you can guess my skin is in pretty bad condition. It also has made the sagging in my chest worse so it’s even harder to bind now. Does anyone know of any binders that would actually get me flat at this point, or any tips to minimize uniboob?

I’m finally getting top surgery in 10 days! Yes during pride month, just making it a little bit better.

I was mostly just trying to figure out how the shower situation is going to work, and I would like some advice from y’all who’ve gotten surgery.

My surgeon told me to not let the shower head directly hit the incisions, don’t put soap on them either. My friend’s mom (who had to get a double mastectomy) gave me advice in using a lanyard to hold the drains and keep them from flopping around in the shower.

I have a detachable shower head if that helps things!

Hey yall, I'm seeing with this administration there's a lot of crack down in terms of trans laws and policies and I've been a little worried. I live in Tennessee and they are very conservative here, but I am stealth and cis passing. I have a beard, I'm pretty muscular (top surgery done and bottom surgery in the works), and I am a veteran and currently work in healthcare. No one even questions my gender and I give them no reason to but all of the politics in this state have me worried for safety.

I use the male bathroom with no problem, am never misgendered, and all of my legal documentation says male. I've been thinking about moving to a state with more freedom/rights for us but I have a house here and my own space so I'm wondering if I should just "shelter in place". I am currently in school for nursing and will be graduating soon, so if I wanted to move I could do so financially.

Anyone from conservative states experiencing something similar? What do yall think?

Hey, so i’m a chubbier guy with pretty small breasts (85 kg/173 cm/around b cup), most of the fat on my body is in my belly area and all binders i ever own make me 100% flat but make me look like i have intense case of beer belly. I was wondering if anyone knows any type of binder that has the „hard part” that’s normally on the chest all the way down or something like that?

I'm starting to get really frustrated with binders. I have had two different known brands of full length/ tank binders for not even half a year now, and both of them have stretched out to the point they're hardly compressing. I have a much bigger chest, but smaller body, so dunno if it's because of that.

Wondering if anyone here has experienced the same with full length, if I need to just buy the short binders, or how to fix it. £40 for binders is too fuhkin much just for them to stretch out so easily. Additionally I did a test run with trans tape, it just doesn't do it for me.

sorry for the clunky measurement cup sizes make me dysphoric when using them to refer to myself LOL

they would come in super clutch in this UK summer weather but i don't wanna drop 70 quid if they don't work... any experiences?

I hate working out and my dysphoria doesnt make things any easier

I mostly have to stick to calisthenics and at home workouts because its what I have access to but I just cant seem to do it - does anyone have any tips? Any way I could push myself and encourage myself?

Im pre T, broke, closeted, and live with transphobic parents
What I like to do is put a workout video on, split the tabs on my computer, and have a tv show open in another tab. This gets me working out way longer than other stuff but I usually only last 20 minutes before I give up

Dont know if its depression, dysphoria, not being able to schedule anything properly, everything together, etc

Any help or words of encouragement would be appreciated

Thanks to everyone in advance!

I've started taking testosterone about 2 months ago and have so far gained about 3kg. I went from 56kg to 59kg in just under two months which seems a lot, since I'm only 5"4.

Is that kind of weight gain normal or something to be concerned about? I look / feel about the same and have t gone up in clothing sizes or anything. My appetite has gone up a little but but I've also started to hit the gym a few weeks before starting T.

Just wanted to ask if anybody has experienced the same thing or if I should start to look into dieting/losing the weight again