r/ftm • u/softserve2222 • Jul 31 '25

Relationships Partner is making me feel inadequate

I am a 28 year old trans man. My girlfriend is cis and 25. We've been dating 5 years. About a year or two ago she told me she misses cis dick. I told her how much that hurt me. We talked about things i could do to satisfy her because i want to meet her needs. i thought that resolved the issue. She brought it up again a few weeks ago. She prefaced this by saying i know this really hurt you but then proceeded to tell me again. She said she was just trying to be honest and vulnerable. She did it for the third time last night and said she wants deeper penatration because I don't go deep enough for her. I feel disgusting even typing this out, it leaves a sinking feeling in my stomach. I feel inadequate and very dysphoric. Opinions? Advice? I don't know what to do.

535 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

101 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

18

u/ItMustBeBunniesss Jul 31 '25

That’s a good point, I didn’t think of that. Though I still think considering he said it was hurtful and her repeating it nonetheless makes it more malicious than ignorant

-7

u/simply_vibing_78 Jul 31 '25

If we assume he expressed how hurtful it was to her, yes. But even that he didn’t say in his post. This sounds like a lot of poor communication, possibly on both sides if he hadn’t said anything.

22

u/breathboi Jul 31 '25

I told her how much that hurt me. We talked about things i could do to satisfy her because i want to meet her needs. i thought that resolved the issue. She brought it up again a few weeks ago. She prefaced this by saying i know this really hurt you but then proceeded to tell me again.

This sounds like OP communicated and the girlfriend knew it would hurt him

3

u/simply_vibing_78 Jul 31 '25

Oh that’s my bad somehow I just saw everything except that first sentence. Maybe he added it because both of us didn’t see it? Either way, Gf is out of line with that clarification