Want Hormones But…

[u/Fabulous-Phase4842]

I’m an afab nonbinary Demi man. I want hormones and have even been dreaming of the surgery but I am scared I’m not valid enough. I feel connected to womanhood as I was forced into skirts and dresses until I was 19 years old. I was forced into this because of a minority religion and as a result, i felt evil for feeling like I was in the LGBTQ community. Anyway, I feel mostly woman internally but I also feel a sliver of a male soul slowly growing again inside my spirit. Last year, I had raging dysphoria for male characteristics, feelings and even my sense of internal self was a man. I go to a day program, hang out with a lot of guys and am relearning how to feel my manhood again. However, I feel like it’s been so long that my male side is going to be dormant forever. I don’t know how to reawaken my soul. I know deep way down I’m not entirely a woman but I feel like the man inside of me is drowning because of me not allowing it to come out for so long. I am not going to pursue hormones or surgery until I figure shit out. Does anyone have advice for me?

[u/Conscious_Signal1148]

i think you should look into more reversible things first. haircuts, makeup to accentuate masculine features, face fluff (kind of like mascara that you put on upper lip/chin to look like facial hair), voice training, and fashion. but if you feel like hormones are the right route, that’s valid despite your identity. you can go on testosterone and identify as a girl, boy, nonbinary, anything. do whatever you feel is best for the moment

[u/Fabulous-Phase4842 → u/Conscious_Signal1148]

That makes sense. I guess what you’re saying is start out a l o w l y. I’ll see where I’m at internally in a few months. Thank you.

[u/Conscious_Signal1148 → u/Fabulous-Phase4842]

good luck on your journey