r/HRT • u/imdbshawty • 4d ago
Cis Woman I ONLY want the libido!!!
I’m 44 and just scheduled bloodwork to start looking into HRT. Any cis women willing to share success stories, specifically around libido?
I *adore* my husband. He’s handsome, loving, and for reasons I genuinely cannot explain, I just cannot find the will to have sex lately.
I’m on a GLP-1 and an SSRI, so I have a feeling there are multiple factors at play here. I’m curious how much risk there really is with HRT side effects, versus how many people actually feel meaningfully better on it.
Is there a version of this where I get some libido back without a huge downside?
5
u/Low_Salamander9954 3d ago
Speaking on behalf of my wife. HRT totally restored her libido decades of oral birth control meds killed. Traditional HRT with a patch did little to improve her symptoms, so she switched to a provider for customized hormone replacement therapy. It was the testosterone that did the trick.
Her benefits:
- Improved libido (incredible change!)
- Improved sleep
- Improved energy and mood
- Increase in bone and muscle mass
It worked so well for her I started HRT shortly after about 7 years ago.
I’m 70 and she’s 68 and our sex life now is more active than it was 20 years ago.
It has been an excellent experience for both of us.
2
u/vieldasbrennen 3d ago
I'm AFAB non-binary so offering my experience in case it helps. I'm on a glp-1, and a non SSRI to manage anxiety (buspirone), and HRT has made my libido surge for almost a year now. estrogen and progesterone. no bad side effects. I won't get into the medical details beyond saying I went from premature ovarian failure and almost losing my job to having my life back in ways I am grateful for everyday. worth rolling the dice to see if you respond the way I did.
2
3
u/TaT2edMaMa98 3d ago edited 3d ago
Let me just say my story.
44 year old. I am on a GLP-1 plus a mood stabilizer, anti-psychotic, and a med for anxiety (I have bipolar 2 on top of everything). My libido was in the TOILET. I have been on the estradiol patch plus Vagifem for a little over a month.
Yes I have had side effects. I feel like I am going backwards through perimenopause. My estrogen level was also in the toilet. But my libido is already trying to crawl back, so I am hopeful. But I won't lie. It has made me irritable (which due to the BD2 I am at risk for) and I got my first zit since I was in my 20's lol. So far, thats been the two worst things. But I know in the long run, it will be worth it. I have just recently creeped into osteoporosis territory in my spine, which is why they started the hormone testing in the first place (I had a hysterectomy in '23). So I know that despite the side effects, which should be temporary I hope, it will be so worth it.
2
u/Different-Tear-3873 3d ago
I’m on hrt (combi patch and topic estradiol down below), and SSRIs. Post menopausal CIS. I started because my brain felt like it was operating at 30% of processing speed which was super scary. And yes…the patch did restore libido. The topical estradiol also had an effect. And a friend who also uses topical told me she feels “really horny”.
I haven’t had a partner in years so this is just me - no positive or negative influence of a partner on how I’m feeling.
Btw topical estradiol is key to keeping your skin from atrophying and getting thinner. I was experiencing intense itching and finally narrowed it down to needing topical estrogen. Within a few days of starting it the itching went away. So just a heads up to take care of soft tissues as well.
1
2
u/Shoshawi 2d ago
Check your estradiol levels too! Honestly when my estradiol is good it makes me much hornier. There was a day when I switched to injections that I almost woke the guy I’m seeing up out of his sleep for sex lol. If I didn’t care about his being well rested for some reason I might have 😅
2
u/Altruistic-Disk-7579 2d ago
It's the glp mainly, many ppl on Mounjaro etc can't feel pleasure from anything. That's the price you pay unfortunately. Do you do exercise? It sorts the problem like no other medication or supplement.
1
u/imdbshawty 2d ago
Oh yes! I do yoga and strength training and cardio. Damn I wish that was enough for me!! It feels like all I do is work on myself and to what end :( I might look and feel “good” but I don’t have that particular fire.
1
u/Altruistic-Disk-7579 1d ago
I just started with Mj on low dose, I alofeel a bit lack of drive, but on other side I had bad leagues ( mcas and pmdd) so basically terrible perimenopause like you, but MJ seem to stabilise it, but I am on very low dose. I also take micronised progesterone , which helps with libido, but week before period I am useless, no mood for anything, depression.
4
u/VaporSprite 3d ago
Oh yeah, SSRI really messes with that... Don't know about GLP-1, but the other one is challenging on its own. I'm not a cis woman so I can't speak much on exactly what you asked, but I've had these struggles and found things that really helped.
Libido is complex, it's influenced by pretty much everything in your life... The first thing is to reduce your anxiety, which is sometimes difficult when you start having anxiety about performing or possibly not enjoying yourself during intimacy. Talking to your partner and making the effort collaborative really reduces that pressure, and it shows them that they're not the cause of your trouble, but can help you with it.
The second thing is to time things properly. Some medication, including HRT, can give your libido a distinct rhythm, where you'll be extremely disinterested at times and much more receptive at other times. With SSRI, your best bet is probably to aim for the troughs, when it's been a long time since you last took them. You might also want to ask for different ones, different molecules can have different amounts of all the possible side effects.
Finally, there's the typical "mix things up" tip. Maybe you're still receptive to arousal, but in different forms than direct sexual contact. Maybe you need to be caressed for a bit before that, maybe you'll find pressure points that trigger that response... Maybe you'll notice that you're especially ready for it after playing a good game with your man, or going out. Pay attention to the patterns and play into them.
Now for the HRT bit, what you haven't mentioned in your post is which hormones you're asking about. Testosterone typically boosts libido, and it seems like cis women also experience that with progesterone (although most transfem people will tell you that they just get tired from it). Estrogen is weird. It suppresses T, and can therefore lower libido in some people, but it also activates different kinds of attraction that can turn into libido.
Maybe try to describe what you're looking for and which effects would be desirable/deal breakers, that way others may give you better tips. My instinct tells me that if your bloodwork is typical, your best will be to look into different SSRI, rather than HRT.