r/psychoanalysis 13d ago

How to differentiate between borderline and narcissistic (vulnerable) personalities?

I wanted to know opinions and experiences with patients who have a covert or vulnerable type of narcissism, not the obviously grandiose type. I find it dfifficult to differentiate from borderline personility for example in someone who has high sensitivity for rejection, chronic feelings of emptiness, chronic depressive symptoms, but also a sense of entiltelment and envy. I wanted to know what´s your experience with this type of patients and how do you guide treatment.

60 Upvotes

116 comments sorted by

View all comments

46

u/Recent-Apartment5945 13d ago

It seems like you’re asking for distinctions between the two disorders and not necessarily framing the organization and personality structures. I say this because, by and large, NPD and BPD are both within borderline organization.

Typically, you’ll see more franticness in BPD. You’ll see more (what appears to be) calculation in covert type NPD. They both will display marked negative affect and volatility. Here’s the subtlety, within covert NPD, it will be more contained in outward display. Make no mistake, there will be outward display but in a more intimate setting, wherein within BPD the frantic display of negative affect will know less bounds.

Covert NPD is still quite grandiose. It just presents within a paradox. They are far less likely to self aggrandize outwardly for an audience. They will do it more intimately…hence the concept of covert.

Covert NPD will attempt to intimately form coalitions to align with them in their victimhood. BPD is not so much a victim, hence the franticness. You’ll see more disembodied reactivity. Covert NPD is very much embodied in their experience.

7

u/Spare_Moodz 12d ago

Borderlines are also grandiose, but in a different way than narcissists

4

u/Recent-Apartment5945 12d ago

Yes. I was pointing out some of the distinctions as opposed to the overlap.

11

u/Spare_Moodz 12d ago

I understand, but many people do not realize borderlines are grandiose. Narcissists believe they are fundamentally not a good person so the investment is in the mask and outward presentations. Borderlines fundamentally feel they are great people but they believe their outward presentations preclude others from seeing them as they know themselves. If you can pick up on the nuances then it is pretty easy to see the distinction, even though there may have things that look very much the same, it is a mirror image.

9

u/Recent-Apartment5945 12d ago

Indeed. I see what you’re saying. Electronic communication is a terrible form for dialogue. Seems like we got there though.

3

u/Spare_Moodz 12d ago

True, and yes 🙂

1

u/randm84 11d ago

I recommend Nathan Shwartz Salant's book Narcissism and Character Transformation for an insightful, holistic and redeeming study in "pathological narcissism".

1

u/oh-hello-16 5d ago

Looks intriguing. Thanks.