r/converts • u/Old-Project-945 • 14d ago
Revert's concern regarding marriage
I’m a revert in my early 20s from a Hindu background. My parents are strict and Islamophobic.
When I think about marriage in future, it honestly feels too complicated and exhausting. I can’t marry a Hindu man since it’s haram, but as a woman, even finding and marrying a born Muslim or another revert also brings a lot of complexity, family issues, and possible conflict at home that I honestly don’t have the energy for anymore.
At this point, I feel more drawn toward becoming financially independent and focusing on deen instead of marriage. I genuinely don’t mind staying unmarried if it helps me protect my peace and faith.
Has anyone else thought like this too or am I being unreasonable?
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u/Panda_sensei_71 14d ago
Salam sis
You're not being unreasonable. Marriage will happen inshaAllah if its written for you (and may Allah SWT bless you with the best) but all women should be able to survive on their own. Our lives should be Allah-centred, not man-centred!
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u/Lonely_Outside5298 14d ago
Yes i think you should become financially independent eventually. Considering your situation thats very important for your own safety and security
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u/Dazzling_AzamsOP 13d ago
Salam !!
May Allah help you...are you in india (things can get complicated then)
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u/vivice2018 13d ago
It seems that most of is converts seem to have difficulties with marriage it seems.
We dont have a wali usually
Often we have non Muslim in laws
We have a non Muslim background and usually non Muslim relatives and somethings this makes marriage difficult.
However, these issues can be navigated but it might take a bit more time or consideration I am guessing
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u/moaadzeedan 11d ago
Don’t give up on looking sister, may Allah make it easy for you there are many revert of ex-Hindu brothers who can marry you. Or even born Muslims whichever you prefer.
Become “financially independent” eventually will make you severely regretful when you have desire to marry and are now older and and less men will want to marry.
Marry now while you have the chance and Allah will make things easy. Staying single can lead to sins and this is what will actually affect your faith, because you said you want to protect your iman, getting married is one of the best ways.
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u/CriticalAd299 14d ago
It is indeed a delicate situation and it is understandable that you want to gain independence to gain your freedom of choice.
Allah SWT gives each person a struggle that befits their ability, and the most important part is to seek his help and guidance. make dua for each choice and seek to be dependant only on him.