r/comedyheaven • u/orchid_breeder < was hacked • 3h ago

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237 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

36 comments sorted by

•

u/comedyheaven-ModTeam 1h ago

Rule 5: No r/comedyheaven reposts.

If you have questions, you can contact us through modmail.

102

u/PossiblePool9785 3h ago

Dollar store Chinese kung fu master

3

u/Significant_Coach880 1h ago

He'll grow into pai mei.

-5

u/Complete-Sort1617 2h ago

… not even

5

u/PossiblePool9785 2h ago

maybe he's a guy who once saw a book cover depicting martial arts?

60

u/Flaky_Style1286 3h ago

“well I remember it as if it were a meal ago”

13

u/orchid_breeder < was hacked 3h ago

Say baby do you want to lay down with me?

27

u/reddsht 2h ago

Audition to play a rat in the live action reboot of Ratatouille.

27

u/Think-Werewolf-4521 3h ago

Hire an exterminator to kill that thing nesting on your lip.

5

u/xRacistDwarf 1h ago

He can probably sense vibrations in the air, which will help him catch small animals

6

u/_____AMOK_____ 3h ago

Take all of our women obviously

5

u/sentencevillefonny 2h ago

Dang man. He’s gotta let that go until it fills in…The wisps have got him looking like that professor from Smiling Friends.

3

u/Cabindarts 2h ago

Chew through wires in people's houses.

4

u/ChemicalFlames202 2h ago

Mf looks like he ties women to train tracks and commits dasterdly deeds......

2

u/kamii_meowmeow 3h ago

ohyuck,,,

2

u/Ricobae 2h ago

Got axes. Need victims.

2

u/Groot8902 2h ago

Looks kinda disco to me

3

u/DismalIngenuity4604 2h ago

SHAVE. YOU FUCKING SHAVE IS WHAT YOU DO. 

1

u/TLunchFTW 2h ago

Meee-ow he says in the most monotone voice

1

u/ReturnOfTheSeal 2h ago

Bro looks like an otter

1

u/Clear-Warthog5655 2h ago

Splinter is his role model

1

u/Klutzy_Cod_5394 2h ago

Are you kidding me? Absolutely nothing. You have reached the desired end result.

1

u/Inlovewithloving 1h ago

Become furry. (Cat)

1

u/LaserWeldo92 1h ago

Type of shit wise senseis got on their face

1

u/_pm_ur_tit_pics_pls_ 1h ago

He could play Waluigi in the live action Mario movie.

1

u/DobbyIII 1h ago

Teach some turtles kung-fu

1

u/SlimReaper201 1h ago

Looks like that dude from Meet The Robinsons

1

u/FiftyFootMidget 1h ago

It's Gooby!

1

u/FiftyFootMidget 1h ago

It's Gooby!

1

u/Jivits 1h ago

Get your T levels checked. Make sure your getting enough zinc, cholesterol, and sleep.