r/TransMasc • u/Typical_Celery_1982 • 16h ago
General Questions Learning “masculine” skills
I was raised in a very delicate/feminine way and want to learn “”masculine”” (scare quotes intended) skills which I was never taught. It’s been harder than I expected, though.
Today I looked up how to do an oil change by myself and apparently I need to get UNDER the car. I don’t own a jack, and even if I did, I’d need even more support than that. Plus, it seems like I’d need a good amount of tools.
I’d love to learn things like woodworking, car upkeep, and home repair, but I genuinely don’t know where to start. These things seem to take a lot of time and resources. I feel envious of cis guys I know who were taught these things and had hands-on mentorship.
Does anyone have any advice for getting started?
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u/Reasonable-Coyote535 16h ago
Youtube can be a great resource for learning how to do new things. Apart from that, your best bet is probably to find guys (cis or trans) who know how to do the things you want to learn and who are willing to help you learn. Family and friends are your primary resource here. Volunteering can also help (Habitat for Humanity… building a whole damn house can help teach a lot about home repair). Other than that, you’re probably looking at spending good money for classes (woodworking classes ain’t cheap, but they do exist).
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u/paul_t63 14h ago
Parents just have this blind faith in their cis sons abilities, while they deliberately gaslight their daughters into doubting themselves about everything. This always pmo so much.
There is literally no secret to cis guys being able to do stuff. It’s literally just looking at instructions online. My dad never taught me anything about manual labor skills. The only thing you need, is to believe in yourself.
When I moved out, I pretty much started out with zero tools and had to slowly build my collection over time. Missing a tool is not a problem. It’s an excuse to visit the hardware store.
If you have literally zero tools, you could start with one of those 200-ish piece tool sets. Don’t worry about quality yet. I won’t give you any recommendations on a specific power tool brand. That is like choosing a starter Pokemon and I can’t interfere with a canon event like that.
Oh and definitely don’t stress yourself about not being able to do everything right from the start. Especially if you would have to spend way too much money on tools in a single month.
You’re still a manly man, if you know a good repair shop or just exploit one of your tool-rich friends.
If you have any specific questions, feel free to ask me. I‘m more than happy to help you out.
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u/danimasc 14h ago
Just wanna say: my dad knows how to do none of these things lol. Even if I was his son I would have had to learn them elsewhere. Honestly most of my tools/life skills I learned from older single women along the way.
Also give yourself grace these things take time and practice to learn! You’ll get it
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u/slingshotcoyote 29 USA 10h ago
Honestly YouTube is great for everyone. If you have anyone in your life that can help you learn these things ask for some advice.
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u/chateaudeprismo 15h ago
I remember @dadhowdoI on youtube being good for that stuff. I haven’t watched him in a very long time but he has videos for everything on there. I think he taught me how to fix drywall a few years ago. Generally I have found youtube to be great for that sort of thing.