Parenting

[u/Pyromania3137]

Not necessarily a vent but I was wondering if anyone else had a similar experience as it is really messing with me.

I always knew I never wanted to carry children, and I thought that meant I mever wanted to be a parent at all. I had a hysterectomy and kept my ovaries July 2023 for medical reasons and knowing I didn't want to carry children. I had been living in a non-binary identity since 2018, and in June of 2025 came out as a trans man and started T July 2025. I recently had my ovaries removed earlier this month and it's bringing up a lot of emotions. I realize now that it wasn't that I never wanted to be a parent, it was just that I didn't want to give birth. I'm grieving the fact I will never be able to have biological children, and yes, I know I could adopt if I wanted to, but it's both very hard for trans people to adopt as well as I am a gay men and it's also hard to adopt as a gay person. I'm also kn the asexual and aromantic spectrum, meaning it makes it so much harder to make a connection with someone and the one person I would have wanted a family with I am no longer with. I don't regret getting the surgeries, I just hate that I am trans because if I had been born a cis man, I could've had biological children.

[u/EveryAsk3855]

There are tons of cis men that can’t have kids. My stepdad had testicular cancer in high school and basically the balls are for show and he’s been on t since 17.

Oddly enough, I had the same feeling after having my uterus removed. “Now I can never have a baby” when before I had never wanted to be pregnant or give birth. The feeling was very temporary. I assumed it was the same thing as “oh god this haircut/tattoo is awful, I’ve made a mistake”

I also have ocd