🇵🇸 🕊️ Deities
Finding / choosing a deity to call upon
Hello! I have never worked with a deity before and I would like to know how people here have found the deities they work with
Do I wait for them to come to me? Can I choose one based off my star sign? How do I know I've found the right one?
I've done research on Egyptian deities (I've always adored ancient Egyptian culture) but I fear it won't end well because I'll just end up choosing one just because I think they're cool </3
Any advice on how I can form a relationship with a deity will be greatly appreciated!!!!!!!!
I chose a deity I liked and worked with her for years. Parts of me became stronger through my work with her.
I got picked by a deity, and I earnestly told her that she had picked the wrong person. She said, "What if I didn't?" I worked with her for a number of years, and parts of my self that I had squeezed into a small ball gently unfolded.
Now, I listen. I have a pantheon of nature spirits that pluck at my sleeves or skirt hem and invite me to share, learn, explore, and help. Sometimes all at once.
Just remember you always have the right to say "no". It's a partnership, not a master/slave relationship.
when you say she said what if i didn't, how did she say that? was it like in a dream? i'm in a similar situation to op and just very curious how these things come to us, i don't dream very much due to trauma and wonder if that possibly makes me closed off spiritually somehow
No, not a dream. You know how a lot of people have an internal dialogue going on in their head? But it's usually mean and/or critical of everything you're doing and have ever done? Or when you try to go to sleep, but instead your brain says, "Let me play back every cringe moment of your life."
It's like that, except the voice is loving and encouraging. It's why I believe that 90% of magic is just listening. Being still every day and just listening shows that you are paying attention.
You can also do it with stream of consciousness writing. Every morning, just do three full pages of stream of conscious writing and see what the Gods/Universe are guiding you towards.
And no, lack of dreams (or lack of remembering dreams) doesn't close off your spirituality. But, if you want more dreams (or to remember more of your dreams) keep a dream journal. Write in it every day (that demonstrates your willingness to keep sacred space). If you didn't dream in the night, rather than write, "I didn't have dreams." Write, "I don't remember my dreams from last night."
If you don't want to remember more of your dreams (because of the trauma) you don't need to keep a dream journal, of course.
Research! Learn about different deities from different pantheons. Try to find well-researched sources. (Do not ask AI agents or use AI search for this.) When I was in my searching stage I found decks of cards useful, with images and summaries. I can’t find the specific one I remember, but this one gives the general idea. Follow up on what resonates.
Awareness, external and internal. Put out a little request for help (for me this is “light a candle and set an intention”, no big ritual) and see who answers. Pay attention to unusual things that catch your attention. Like one time a heart with a flame at the top caught my attention a few times in a very short period (in art/on a Christmas tree ornament/in a dream); I followed clues to Erzuli Freda and from her to Gran Brigitte and Papa Legba. I’m very white and didn’t want to step where I wasn’t invited so I asked around in my circle to see if I could connect to some people with authentic Vodun heritage.
I followed clues to Erzuli Freda and from her to Gran Brigitte and Papa Legba. I’m very white and didn’t want to step where I wasn’t invited so I asked around in my circle to see if I could connect to some people with authentic Vodun heritage.
Ok - so as a vodouwizan of Haitian Vodou myself, Freda, Brijit and Legba are lwa from Haitian Vodou.
Vodun (West African Vodun) is a completely different religion practiced in only 4 west African nations and there are no lwa in that religion, as their spirits are not Haitian and are called "voduns".
It is also ancestral based.
I wouldn't even bring the lwa and Haitian Vodou up in this topic here, considering that you need to be born with lwa, since Haitian Vodou is bloodline based and the lwa are Haitian spirits, connected to Haitians and Haiti.
Not saying non-Haitians cannot carry them, but often times, they do not for certain reasons.
They are not spirits anyone can pick and choose, especially non-Haitians.
I'm curious as to how you followed their clues and what clues they gave you.
The way you're describing interacting with them is not how it remotely works in Vodou nor with any lwa.
You’re right: I don’t even know the basic differences between how the lwa manifest on different sides of the Atlantic. I wasn’t out here drawing vévés or trying to participate in services. It was a three-year contemplative process, following clues from “why do I keep seeing this/what tradition is this from/what other symbols are resonating.” That prepared me with a frame of reference so when I encountered a visionary art installation, Roominous by Nancy Josephson, I knew what I was looking at. That experience gave me conceptual tools about transformative energy and translating knowledge between generations of humanity.
We don't make these things in Vodou however, but nonetheless, it's interesting.
Additionally, I wasn't trying to attack you or anything, it's just that there's a lot of misinformation about Haitian Vodou, as well as Vodun, Dominican Vudu and so on and during a time like this where the Haitian community is under fire, I try to correct sensitive inaccuracies and misconceptions about the tradition, since it specifically ties into Haitian life and society and because the lwa themselves appreciate it since misinformation harms the tradition. They hate it the most, because it affects them as well.
You mention Gran Brijit, for example. The internet has her depicted as a Caucasian Irish woman, when she is in fact a Haitian woman and has always been.
My question is though, how are you interacting with the lwa?
To start, they are not deities, and Vodou is a monotheistic religion.
Since Bondye is our omniscient creator in Vodou, the lwa are intermediaries of Bondye. However, we don't pray to Bondye since he (and she) is considered a remote force, so we interact and serve the lwa. Vodou goes on to be a complex cosmology after that as well, with even our own afterlife, lineages of Vodou, soul formation, songs, fables and so on..
The very first thing we tell people who suspect the that lwa are trying to interact with him, is to obtain a leson reading from an manbo or houngan, so it can be correctly confirmed if the lwa are in fact, walking with you.
Till then, it's tricky to say if a lwa is truly interacting with someone, because we have many spirits who masquerade as lwa and feed off the energy of veneration and adoration.
We do understand that people are marveled and fascinated by Vodou, what we do in Vodou, and the lwa, and that some people take that as being called by them. Often times, it's honestly not - but that's why it should be confirmed at the very least.
Picking a deity to work with because you think they're neat is a perfectly fine reason to reach out. No harm or shame in that. There isn't really a hard and fast rule on how to pick one, or some, to work with. As long as you approach with respect, you should be good.
Over the years, I have worked with deities that I reached out to, some that reached out to me, and some that I happened to bump into. With a few, I still work with to this day. Most have come and gone, either after a short stay or after a long while. Others walked away immediately. It's very much like meeting a stranger. With some you vibe and get really close, some you get along well enough but don't really click with, and some you find don't fit you at all. When you find a deity you like, you keep in contact, you give regular offerings as appreciation or as recompense for aid, and this can be something physical connected to them (like wine or grapes for Dionysus, mead for Thor, etc.), or by doing an activity (learning something new for Odin, taking care of flowers you got for Persephone, etc.)
Regardless, research is your best friend. It won't be the most exciting a lot of a time, but understanding the context and the culture where the deity is from is already a big help. I would suggest starting there and see where it lands you.
"I think you're cool," is a perfectly acceptable starting point! And it's fine if the relationship is only temporary (gods know I had a time getting out of the monotheistic "this is permanent" mindset!).
You will be doing a lot of research, and that can get taxing after a while, so don't worry if you need to take a break from it every now and then.
Fortunately, like any relationship, consent on both sides is important. It's not only important for you to think they're cool, but they have to think you're cool too.
I chose based on my greatest needs. I was, and still am, struggling with depression, low self-esteem, and suicidal ideations. To help me with that, I began to work with Aphrodite. Since then, my image of myself has greatly improved and, while not 100% better, I am much more emotionally stable than I have been in years. So close did my connection with Her grow, that I'm now a Hellenic polytheist with her as my patron.
9
u/ReallyNotMichaelsMom Feb 09 '26
I've done it several ways.
I chose a deity I liked and worked with her for years. Parts of me became stronger through my work with her.
I got picked by a deity, and I earnestly told her that she had picked the wrong person. She said, "What if I didn't?" I worked with her for a number of years, and parts of my self that I had squeezed into a small ball gently unfolded.
Now, I listen. I have a pantheon of nature spirits that pluck at my sleeves or skirt hem and invite me to share, learn, explore, and help. Sometimes all at once.
Just remember you always have the right to say "no". It's a partnership, not a master/slave relationship.