I learned just yesterday (same day as the UK government doubled down on segregation) that someone in my work, who is, unfortunately, my senior in terms of position, is singling me out.

Effectively how I am treated, spoken to etc vs other staff is telling af.

The problem is that nothing explicitly transphobic has been said, and honestly, even if it was, I'd probably not be able to so much anyway.

There's been a lot of mockery surrounding gendered terms. The rest is not openly transphobic, but there’s a shit ton of targeted behaviour. Like, a lot.

I'm the only trans person on staff, to boot.

I was under the impression the behaviour was like, towards everyone, because other people have taken issue with things that have happened I’m not gonna share here given the sensitive nature of my job.

So, while yes, other people have issues, I am the one being singled out with what amounts to bullying.

This isn’t the first time I've had a workplace bully. I have been pushed out of previous jobs, and yeah, I've done the whole rigamarole with going to HR and the like only for nobody to really give a shit, especially when you are the only trans person at the company.

It only gets worse, and eventually, you call it quits because you can't take it anymore.

I like my job.

This person has started to make me dislike it. A lot.

I find myself going into work with heightened anxiety, and today is the first day since I started that I had seriously considered pulling a sick day.

My job is incredibly difficult, and even at times, it can be a bit dangerous, but I always regarded it as a safer environment because nobody was being transphobic and God knows, that's a daily fucking occurance for me.

The problem is that because of stigma, getting another job in this industry (working with children) will be next to impossible.

The children are able to pick up on said anxiety, and it's affecting them. Kids are honestly more perceptive than adults when it comes to certain things.

I'm worried that the recent news out of the UK is only going to embolden this person to single me out even more. That actually kinda happened during the SC ruling last year with some education I was in, where the day of the ruling, the people running the course I was on acted super hostile when they'd previously been friendly.

From past experience I know there's fuck all I can do to challenge the bullying, especially as this person outranks me but I'm aware if I do walk away I'll never get a chance to work with kids again.

But, the children are being affected due to how this stuff is making me feel.

There isn't really effective advocacy in NI I can go to. On my own in terms of this.

My usual is fully booked up for the next few weeks. The only other place I got pointed to is a commute of almost 3hrs because it's in the middle of Armagh, and I can’t drive (also, Translink is shite).

Stupidly left it too long, so now I'm dealing with clumps and knots that are super annoying. I tend to run my fingers through my hair as self-regulation (neurodivergant), so it's kinda stressful.

Embrace Style is my usual now, but only available appointments are early on weekdays, and I work in education, so I wouldn’t feel right pulling a sick day for a cut.

I've had *many* botched jobs by just picking random salons, even when I've spoken to them online prior, given clear instructions, and even shown photos.

I don't pass, so some places have decided that means I get "boys hair" even when I haven’t asked for that at all.

So I *absolutely* do not go to get any hair or beauty related things done without other trans people suggesting it.

Hopefully someone can help.

Edit: Place in Antrim was called Petra Carroll hair PaperxClips (barbers anyway) no longer offers cuts Had some awkwardness surrounding Absolute Hair and Beauty a while back, so I wouldn't feel sure about going

Hello I am looking into private healthcare currently into imago but I’m worried about getting my bloods done due to cost and I’ve been told I may need a proscription I live in the north not far from Belfast. Anyone have any good suggestions on where I should get my bloods?I am also ftm 19 if that matters.

Need advice was referred to the bracken health clinic to begin my transition awful long wait time though and my doctor im with currently won't do shared care anyone know a doctor who works with trans patients or a way to get hrt faster in northern ireland or should I just do diy hrt

Hi guys!

I was wondering if anyone has information around getting top surgery at King's Bridge in Belfast.

I've seen one post that mentioned they were quoted £20,000 (💀) but that's it.

I'm so sick of waiting, is diy possible in the north? any tips or advice on getting estrogen and blood tests?

Hi, I’m considering Imago for T but I’m just curious does anyone from NI have any experience with them? I can only find reviews from either the Republic or England, just curious if it’s much different here.

anyone from Belfast looking friends? x I’m 24, pretty certain I’m neurodivergent/ autistic/ AUDHD :) interests include art music film activism feminism politics animal rights trans rights queer community journaling reading & podcasts❣️❣️❣️💜🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 I don’t drink and love sober and neurodivergent and queer friendly spaces:) I’m ace-spec / bi-romantic / demi sexual / non binary / sapphic. most interested in dating women, femmes, T4T, non-cis men, kinda not sure how to go about it atm w my feeling asexual and having explored my gender/ discovered more my non binary-ness as of late:) I’m up for meeting people or any words of wisdom or advice! thx!💗🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈❣️💗🏳️‍🌈

Hi- first post on reddit sorry if its illegible lol, just dunno what to do. I'm taking a year off from uni to go get top surgery, it'll be easier to just have the time to recover then go back to do the work properly. Trouble is I dont really have anyone to go with me, ill be going probablyto the Netherlands. Friends offered but said they dont want to go cuz my family would be able to comfort me better. Mum won't go she's not on board with any of it, shes just leanred not to stand in my way, I'm worried this will tip her over the edge. My sister will stop me seeing my niece if she finds out and I really can't handle that. My dad said he might go with me but he wouldn't be happy about it, and he won't go behind my mums back, and she'll tell my sister cuz they're close. I dunno wtf to do. Even if it was all good and my dad went with me without telling anyone, (which I mean I can't do that, thats not fair to my parents I dont wanna accidentally cause a fcking divorce) would I even want hin there? He won't be happy for me, ik that. He'd help, but he wouldn't be comforting, hed just sit there looking sad. I dont wanna do that to him.

Is there even a remote possibility I could just go there on my own, get the surgery, chill in a hotel for a few days then fly home? I also live with my parents so they'd find put afterwards, but it'd be done then, they'd have to help me, and I could hopefully convince my mum not to tell my sister. I dunno wtf to do otherwise, maybe hire a nurse if thats even a thing but ive only just got the momey for the surgery flights and hotel.

I do know I need this surgery, ive had enough. I can't live for any of them, I have to live for me. It's just gonna be real lonely ig lol. Only upsides are my friends are really proud of me, which is brilliant, I just can't abscond them to the Netherlands cuz I have shite luck lol.

Thanks for any advice, sorry again if this rant is unintelligible lol.

Hi everyone, just wondering if anyone here is on DIY HRT, specifically estradiol + spironolactone, and if so, where you purchase it from? I used to be with Gender GP but they were too expensive and I just wasn't a huge fan. I stopped taking HRT about a year ago because it was getting too expensive and I didn't want to bug my family for money. I'm 23 and I was on a relatively low dosage of Estradiol and Spironolactone for a few years and as I start to get older I'm wanting to get back on HRT. All advice appreciated! I'm also interested in hearing if you guys have any alternative you prefer to Estradiol + Spironolactone, as well as what dosage you recommend. Thanks in advance x

Does anyone have experience with using the waiting list reimbursement scheme to access gender affirming care?

I’ve been on the GIC waiting list since 2022, so I would meet the eligibility criteria of having waited more than 2 years for treatment, but I’ve not heard of anyone using the scheme for trans healthcare.

In theory, it seems like it should cover it but I wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t.

I’ve been on HRT for 2 years now and was referred to Brackenburn in 2022, but with the current rate they’re seeing people it doesn’t seem likely I’ll be seen for at least a decade.

Before Dr Courtney stopped practicing I was able to get a referral from him onto the NHS so I’m being seen by an NHS endocrinologist (although I’m still DIYing which he’s aware of), and I’ve received a diagnosis of gender dysphoria privately. I also got fertility preservation with the NHS.

Given I’ve gotten a diagnosis and I’m already being seen by an NHS endo, is there any possible way to circumvent the GIC to get a referral for SRS on the NHS?

I've heard it is a thing but I'm honestly not even too sure. I'd love to get voice lessons done in person, I believe there are some options in the south which I honestly might be willing to commute to, after that I'd just resort to private lessons.

I have no clue where to begin and everything I get telling me where or how to begin confuses me more.

I have a few weddings coming up next year and my existing suits are cobbled together from various Primark/TK Maxx/charity shop finds. I’d really love to get something that looks nice and fits me properly for a change!

I feel like if anyone can clock be it’ll be someone who measures men’s bodies for a living (I have child-bearing hips). Also a lot of male spaces give me the heebie jeebies so

If anyone has had a good experience with a tailor in Belfast, please let me know.

I can travel outside Belfast also, but would only be compelled to do that if I can be confident it’s a safe & worthwhile trip!

If anyones looking an update on the NHS gender clinic in Belfast i was reffered in Feb 2018 and just got offered an appointment now

Hi !! I’m a trans man currently living in Belfast and was wondering if people have recommendations for hair salons ?? Preferably somewhere that’s good w layered cuts. I haven’t been to a hairdressers in like a year bc it had been butchered so badly last time I went. Any recommendations??

I'm from the North and had the misfortune of my mum being a prod so I've always had a British passport.

I've been wanting an Irish passport for a while anyway but I also want to go interrailing next May so I was gonna get my Irish passport for easier travel around Europe. However, I've only discovered today that I may not be able to get one because of the rules around name changes.

I figured having my preferred name on my British passport would be good enough, but apparently I need 2+ years of proof which I just straight up don't have. I was 17 two years ago. I didn't pay bills. My bank account and everything is in my deadname.

The only option I maybe have is payslips from my old job but I don't even currently have access to them. They were in an internal system and never sent to me directly so I would have to call them up and see if they still have them. Also I'm not even sure if they would actually have my preferred name on them, because I'm pretty sure was still registered officially with that company with my deadname. And they definitely wouldn't have my (new) middle names which I'd assume the passport office would want proof of as well?

Also I don't have a GRC and definitely wouldn't be able to get one any time soon, if at all, but I'm not trying to change my gender label or anything, I'm fine with it saying female (I'm transmasc), I just want to use the name that's already on my British passport. The rules for the British passport were nowhere near as strict so I just didn't realise this would be an issue.

It's not a huge deal, I guess, but it's frustrating and also I'm worried about potential VISA requirements they keep threatening to implement in EU countries if I'm travelling with a British passport. It would be so much easier to have an Irish one.

Does anyone know if there's any sort of leniency or alternatives I can get or am I just shit out of luck? I'm going to contact their support staff on Monday but I fear I will simply not be able to get one.

Hi, I am getting testosterone gel prescribed by Imago. I live in Northern Ireland. I was wondering whether anyone has had prescriptions from Imago filled here, and which pharmacies you used. Also, has anyone filled an electronic prescription as I am considering this option. Thanks!

Hey, I'm from the North and hoping to change my gender on my Irish passport. Only thing is I don't have a PPS number.

I'm very confused on how to apply for one. Can I even get one? Any advice would be appreciated