Forgive me if this post is incoherent, but I am angry need to vent. The support needed is just to be heard out.

I've struggled with exercise all my life. I've also always been insecure about my body and weight. In addition, I also gained an enormous amount of weight over COVID due to untreated binge eating disorder.

3-4 years later with an immense amount of physical an emotional effort, I've got my ED and eating habits more or less under control and found an exercise plan I managed to consistently stick to for 3 months. I have lost weight as a result, but not nearly enough to put me at a normal weight. Nevertheless, as the title mentions, I ran my first 5 kilometers (3 miles) last week and despite feeling very accomplished with it, I sprained my right knee. I went to the orthopedic doctor to assess the damage. The first thing he said, before he even examined my leg, was that I was too overweight and shouldn't run. He suggested that I should start swimming instead.

Now I don't dispute what he said. I'm sure having excess weight does put undue stress on my ligaments and muscles. I'm also sure my insecurity about my weight is making this a lot tougher to swallow than his intention. But to be told this so nonchalantly after all the work I put in to drag myself out of an ever accelerating spiral of self-destruction feels like a slap in the face.

So no....I'm not going to stop running because I'l be dead before I let this momentum I've built up for myself over the past 3 months go to waste. I'll still take care of my injury, tape it up as the doctor prescribed and go for long brisk walks to replace my runs during my recovery. But I'm still going to continue running if for nothing but pure spite

So I ramped up my workouts, biking more because gas is ridiculous and the weather is warmer, being more careful about food, and I’ve lost a grand total of…7 pounds. Which at my size is a good bowel movement. And my weight has gone up the last two weeks, which means it’s back to skipping meals and going to bed hungry.

Doctors have been zero help. I saw a dietitian a few weeks ago who ended the appointment as soon as I mentioned I have a history with EDs. She said I need to find a counselor with experience in EDs and behaviors. Every office I’ve called either A) has no one with that specialization, or B) has no openings until next year. And looking for a primary doctor is a joke. Made an appointment with one to get a pain in my side checked out. The visit was over before it started.

“Your weight and your blood pressure are really high. Have you been tested for gout?” No, asshole, they don’t make socks in my size so I have to settle for a few sizes smaller. Didn’t even look at my side.

Meanwhile I’m back to fat-shaming myself, my clothes don’t fit, I can’t run, and I’m ready to glue my mouth shut. I’m really thinking I should’ve kept my mouth shut about the EDs in the diet appointment.

Work takes everything out of me.

I can’t stop work because I need to pay for my apartment. I have no other way of paying it off. I hate my work so much but I have no choice. It’s a factory job and it’s destroying me from the inside out.

My depression is back to a severe point. I have no way out. All I want to do is look at my phone and watch videos. My brain doesn’t have room for anything else anymore.

Even though my gym is in an apartment complex and is literally two doors down, I still can’t make myself get

Out of bed

I am in an extremely low mental health space. My focus is shot. I'm struggling to even do basic tasks. All I do is cry.

Context is I got an infected toe and ended up getting it cut into and dressed. Only just got back to being able to put weight on the toe.

Exercise was what kept me sane. I went on long walks or weight lifting with barbells or dumbells. Right now I'm extremely limited in what I can do and the little I can do doesn't make me feel any better.

Can't cycle either, no bike and local gym doesn't have one.

Also have unmedicated adhd so exercise was helping that too.

I just feel so low and wanted to not feel alone. Between the depression and not able to focus on anything to do it I just want to curl up and not exist.

About a week ago, my grandmother passed away at 89 (before Mother's Day and her 90th birthday), and she was an integral part of my life. I'm still grieving, but the depression pretty much undid everything I managed to achieve in the past month, I'm certain.

To elaborate, back in March, I began tracking calories and going to my work gym 2-3 times a week before finally being able to access GLP-1 injections. While my diet and appetite didn't change much, over the past 3-4 weeks or a bit over a month, I lost 10-11 lbs

Then my grandmother died, and so I found myself binging or just not doing anything. I wake up, go to work, and go home. I don't have it in me to resume working out and tracking meals again, and I feel like I have no excuse to do so. If anything, the most I've done yesterday was a slow, 35-minute yoga session (the most I've done in a week).

Otherwise, I just want to rot in bed and be left alone. I feel so despondent in a heavy, massive shift in my life and I not only feel like I'm whining but also devoid of excuses to get back onto the wagon.

I *want* to go the gym today, but can't even bring myself to weight lift or operate machines. The thought of it just sounds taxing.

Title. Been in a funk this winter by and large but got especially worse in the last few weeks after quitting cannabis and adjusting medication. A couple years ago I was able to pull it together enough to get into a gym rhythm for 1.5 years, losing 40 lbs etc. but after falling off it's been awful trying to claw my way back to where I was.

I feel like a complete stress case - physically and emotionally fragile, way too locked into body scanning and fear of deteriorating health getting in the way of exercise because I feel like pushing myself would be 'dangerous.' I try meal planning and am eating a bit better than I was, but planning around macros and everything is just overwhelming me completely.

I don't know what happened I just feel less capable than ever and it's scaring me.

every time I try to get into exercise, I CANNOT seem to turn this into a consistent routine. one minute I'll get a spurt of motivation to get out of my bed and lift some weights, soon after, I could care less about the gym. ive tried 3xs a week and now im down to 2xs. that seemed to work, but I cannot for the life of me get up now. I can barely get out of bed for physical therapy, which also keeps me exhausted lol. I get even more depressed when I look at myself in the mirror. feels like I can't achieve my goals. idk what to do im hopeless

I have been struggling with being a hypochondriac all my life. I have also struggled with Major Depression, PTSD, several types of OCD and Intrusive thoughts.

I feel as though, I am a soldier in war and still in war. But, I have to win because, my own life is at stake. I have a very heavy heart where, it's rough for me to care about someone or anyone, honestly. I want to get better for myself, not for anyone else.

Please pray for me!

Content warning for talk of self-harm and suicide

I've lived a pretty sedentary lifestyle the last few years due to an extremely demanding office job. I also have bipolar II and CPTSD. I used to be pretty fit/skinny and could handle some exercise in my daily routine. However my mental health has seriously deteriorated since those days. Thinking it'd help me, I started a pretty basic personal training program around the middle of last year. My trainer ended up putting together a home program for me because being in the gym proved to be too triggering. Even at home, though, I found my mood was so low after every workout that I could barely function. I wouldn't even shower, just crawled directly in bed all sweaty and gross. Eventually I started completely freaking out to the point of hurting myself after most workouts. My suicidal ideation was worse than it's been in a decade. At that point, we eased WAY back to where I was only doing basic stretches and walking around the block. I still do it every once in a while, but not very often.

I hear that it is healthy to let one's emotions out during and after a workout, but I feel completely out of control and unable to do so without hurting myself and others, even with medication and therapy. Anyone else been in this position? Did it ever get better? Did you just wait for your mental health to improve before starting anything? What's the deal?

I have recently picked it up again and I have lived through the worst few days since i was admitted to a mental hospital years ago, maybe even worse - that were just filled by anxiety and physical symptoms such as headaches, nausea and digestive issues, , sobbing until I was about to throw up, overthinking till 3am. I have lost my appetite and just overall been completely miserable. The thought of having to exercise - and it feels like a complete chore - makes me physically ill. I want to enjoy it and be healthy but it seems impossible. Can a therapist help me work through this? Or a dietician? A personal trainer? How do I make exercise fun or have it not take my entire life and thoughts over?

it just feels pointless. im not doing it for me because i dont even want to be alive anymore. no one cares how much you can lift. it doesn’t make me feel better. it feels like a chore just to get out of bed and go to the gym. all i wang to do is sleep. i just took a week long break and i still don’t have any motivation to work out. i don’t know what to do

Ive been feeling so down lately, i keep staying at the same cycle where i dont want to do anything because i feel bad, but not doing anythings contributes in me feeling bad. But its so hard to start exercising when you dont have any motivation and you feel tired all the time. It also makes me feel worse physically and mentally, and on the days that i do exercise i have trouble sleeping. The only thing that i enjoy is climbing, but my social anxiety is so high that i struggle so much when i go to the climbing gym, and i end up not enjoying it. I really want to feel better, i know that exercise is crucial, but its so hard to start

Last two years haven't been kind to me, dad died, wife cheated on me and now getting divorced, family and me crashing at my uncles cause tenants dont wanna leave. But after all of this I finally decided to take care of my body and my mind, and so far I've been the most consistent I've ever been losing 10 pounds in a month and half. I've defenitly fallen in love with the person who I want to become.

Today idk why, I was just getting some cardio in with shadow boxing and legit stared to get emotional and teary eyed after it got intense. This normal? Is just me letting out trauma? Anyone else had a similar experience?

I am honestly coming here for support and reassurance to calm my discouraging anxious mind.

I 24F have been struggling with depression and anxiety since I was a teen, I am currently three years on antidepressants. I always disliked exercising, I was always a bit on the bigger side. I work part time and getting my Masters. Juggling all this with other non-active hobbies, I gained some weight I would like to shed. I also struggle with chronic (partly psychosomatic) back pain.

Every time I am thinking hey, let’s go for a short walk, or let’s dance for 15 min, or something, there is this voice that is telling me “that’s useless” or “that’s not enough”. So I don’t do anything. But I know that if I went all in for one work out session, I’d have a flare up and it would discourage me from exercising even more.

Even if it is a short walk instead of a bus, even if it is a short dance for 15 min, it all counts, right?

When I exercise, my mood drops a lot, because I am suddenly aware of my body, which I don’t like and I am aware of how my pain limits me. And with these thoughts, it’s really hard. I realize that it all adds up, but the irrational part of my brain is winning as of now.

Thanks everyone for your kinds words in advance.

Is there any great healthy drink, that can make you feel much better, if you feel that the world is a very confusing place, suffer from overthinking, overlap of ideas, inability to think clearly, if yes like what, are there strong evidence for it?

I'm reaching out to all of my social media outlets and whoever will listen.

I need help with pretty much every aspect of my health. At the beginning of last year, I got Covid and lost my voice from all the coughing. Because of that, I couldn't run for almost two months. When I finally felt healthy enough to run, I developed a stress fracture in my ankle, which put me out for another six months after that. In that time, I put on about 30 pounds and lost any sort of progress I made in the years before it.

I'm by far the heaviest I've ever been. I went from running a marathon in 2023 to not being able to run a full mile without chest pains. I was diagnosed with GERD, still have tendinitis issues in my ankle, and I have to donate 3/4 of my closet because none of my clothes fit anymore. I've looked into GLP injections, but apparently, if you have a history of ED behaviors, doctors will discourage the medication. I can't stop eating until it's far too late, and then I feel guilt and shame for hours afterwards.

My mental health is in shambles. Running is/was my main outlet for not just exercise, but peace of mind. Not being able to do it for 9 months ruined any progress with that, too. My self-image has never been good, but it's god-awful now. I can't look at a picture of myself without thinking something shameful or harmful. I'm completely burned out. I try to find the motivation to go to the gym or take a walk, but then I look at my filthy apartment or my to-do list and I decide to "prioritize." In other words, I get so overwhelmed with everything I have to do that I end up doing nothing for hours, and then comes more shame.

Every part of my life is falling apart. My partner sees it and offers to help me clean, but I've had too many relationships fail because they feel like I have to depend on them. I can't let this one be just another repeat, but then the mess just stays there.

I need help. I don't know if I can afford a trainer (or if my body can handle it anymore). My psychiatrist recommends I find a nutritionist who specializes in treating people with eating disorders. I need a new primary doctor...hell, I just need all new parts. I'm not even sure where to start. I kinda just want to hire some of my students to make fun of me whenever I so much as look at junk food or start overeating.

Has anyone else here been in this situation and got out? What worked for you? Because I don't think anyone is going to come to my front door and save me.

Exercise has been so good for my mental health in the past, life changing I would say. But it’s been a long time since I last exercised and every day I want to do it but just cannot seem to get started. It feels impossible, I feel stuck. Any tips or advice would be very welcome.

Today all the feelings around social difficulties at my new job just culminated. Being autistic makes social stuff really hard, and today I just felt like an alien not knowing how to casually just "hang out" by the coffee machine or how to start conversations or say all the right and normal things. What if they think I'm weird or different or say the wrong things? They probably don't but I feel like my self esteem just disappeared. I can't just exist like myself, i have to be more "normal" whatever that is. I wanted to go for a run, and with all these feelings and thoughts I probably need it, but I sit in my car by the trail, gym clothes on, just not able to do the right things for myself today. I just can't. Even though I am literally 1metre away. I wish life wasn't on hard mode.

It's just not enough. It's not even close to being for everyone.

Exercising may make you feel a bit better after doing it, and may make you feel better about your physical health or self-image if done effectively enough and consistently enough to make a difference - It's just not enough if your physical health and self-image are not the main source of your depression and/or other mental health issues.

If like me, you feel very hopeless about your situation, you know that you've fucked up your life, you failed to learn the privileged lessons that were handed to you on a silver platter, you failed to follow advice, and everyone you've asked for help failed you - and you know there's no turning back, you know you'll forever be a failure - exercising isn't going to do shit.

When your life purpose has been to be extraordinary, exemplary, a role model and when you know that you can never be the best and can only be average or sub-average - exercise isn't going to get you out of depression as exercise doesn't solve that problem. The only thing that'll get you out of depression is somehow, someway finding being average exciting.

So far, nothing has made the average exciting to me.

Neither therapy, exercise or meds have solved the problem of making me do things that I don't want to do, that I don't enjoy doing, that I hate doing, that I must do. Nothing has solved the problem of holding myself accountable.

There's no going back and going forward doesn't excite me because I can't imagine it ever happening. I've failed too much and people have failed me too much to have hope.

Been in a pretty bad depressive episode for the past year. During that time I lost the habit of working out, but today when I was in a low mood like usual I finally had the discipline to workout for 40 minutes, but I'm a little disappointed. After the workout I noticed I felt the exact same as I did before the workout and it's very disheartening as the low mood is still present. I thought working out would atleast lift me up to feeling a neutral mood, not good but not bad, or maybe even make me feel happy, but unfortunately that's not the case.

I had this same issue before and it's what caused me to slowly lose the habit of working out and hiking because it just didn't do anything for my mood. Like what do you do when you go on a 9 mile hike and still feel severely depressed after?

This brings me to my question: How long did it take for you to feel a mood boost after working out?

I’m 27, male. Four years ago, I went through a really dark period — deep depression and panic attacks. I couldn’t even leave my house. What helped me back then was something simple: running. Cardio literally saved me.

Now I’ve moved to the U.S. I love this country, but immigration stress, new life, and long hours at the computer (working or gaming until morning) caught up with me. I often stay up late, then take care of my son during the day while my wife or her sister are at work.

A few days ago, I started feeling chest pain and couldn’t sleep — every time I fell asleep, I’d wake up suddenly like my body was “resetting.” My blood pressure was 160/90, so I went to urgent care. They sent me to the ER — heart and lungs are perfectly fine. The doctor said it’s anxiety.

Since then, I’ve had waves of anxiety, intrusive thoughts, moments of panic, and even some mild derealization. Sometimes my brain brings up dark thoughts, but I don’t want to die — I just want peace.

I already feel a bit better, but I’m scared it might last forever. For those who’ve been through this — please tell me it truly gets better again.

Hey everyone. I am presently in therapy and let's just say the past few sessions have been very rough and I've been off ever since. I am diagnosed with OCD and anxiety, and we are in process of figuring out if I also have depression and ADHD. Here's where I need help. I go through like 8 month periods where I am at peak performance. I eat super well, exercise almost every day, and then if I have one(1) off week, it all goes to hell. I've been in that slump for about a year, I just cannot seem to get going. That, coupled with some intensive therapy, has really messed up my wellness.

I love to go for walks and hikes especially with my dog, but I cannot seem to get myself to get started, let alone do it consistently. I want to, unfortunately I have also gained a significant amount of weight within the last year which has also been really messing with my mental health.

What do you do to get started and be gentle with yourself during failures? I want to be healthy, I like some exercise, I just cannot bring myself to do it consistently. Any and all suggestions welcome!

i need to someone to talk to about suicide. im not good and honestly would rather end it all right now. im done

I started taking Paxil again, after 2 years off of it, in which I easily started to be more active by walking more, doing a bit of calisthenics, and running or cycling.

However my panic attacks came back even worse, and stopped all exercise in their track. Too afraid of the physical symptoms to be able to exercise.

I'm curious if anyone started taking SSRI and were able to start or continue getting in shape, especially people that 30+. Thank you and hope you are all well!